


Return my Love

by Pcyqo



Series: Return my Love [1]
Category: Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Angst, F/F, Hanahaki Disease, Love, Unrequited Love, aqours - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-05
Updated: 2019-05-05
Packaged: 2020-02-26 11:34:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18716233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pcyqo/pseuds/Pcyqo
Summary: It is said that a certain disease is born from unrequited love. The victim's lungs and throat will fill up with petals and eventually, the victim will cough them up. If the disease is left untreated, then the victim will inevitably choke on these petals and die. However, the only two ways the disease can be cured is if the person returns the same feeling or if surgery is performed. A consequence of the surgery, however, is that the victim will lose their feelings. This is Hanahaki Disease.





	Return my Love

**Author's Note:**

> So, Hanahaki is one of my favorite things in romance. RikoYou is one of my favorite ships. Now you put them together, and what do you get? This thing. Please enjoy my trash shipping. :)

What is love?

A controversial question. Many people say it's an "indescribable feeling". It is a feeling of yearning someone, a feeling beyond physicality. Whenever you see the person you "love", it fills you with hope, happiness, content. Other people may describe it as a feeling of lust. You want to have that person all to yourself. You never want to see them go away. You want them to pay attention to you. Seeing people around the person you love hurts you. A bunch of knives stabbing into your heart, people describe it as. Many people may also describe it as wanting the person you love to be happy. You'll do anything just to make them happy. Even if it means sacrificing yourself, even if it means destroying yourself, the end is worth it.

There is something that closely describes the last meaning of "love". Unrequited love. Unrequited love is when one is hopelessly in love with another person. You are willing to do anything for that person's happiness because you love them. But they will never look at you the same way. Your feelings will never reach them, despite everything you do. Unrequited love is hell. That is You Watanabe's diagnosis.

 

You wakes up on her side. She stares at the empty spot on her bed. She yearns for a certain wine-red haired girl to be there. She yearns to see her smile, their hands entwined, their bodies touching, their lips touching. She aches for that girl to be next to her when she wakes up. But this is impossible for You. This will never happen, You told herself. But then, why does it hurt so much? You clutched where her heart would be. "Why does it hurt?" she questions. Tears stream out. You knows her tears and her feelings won't reach Riko. She's come to that conclusion. She's accepted it. Then, why does she still feel it? Why does she feel pain?

You gets up from the bed. She does her daily routine of jogging a bit before returning home. Jogging is a way that helps her cope. Without jogging, You can't clear her mind and her day goes awry. However, jogging is just another excuse for her mind to focus on something else. She looks at the ocean and the environment around her to take her mind off of a certain girl. But this cannot distract her much longer. Even if she tries her hardest, her mind always go back to that certain wine-red haired girl. Once You is done with her jog, she returns home, covered in sweat. She takes a shower, brushes her teeth, eats breakfast, and finally changed into her school uniform. It's something any normal girl does.

You goes out of the house and walks towards the bus stop. Nowadays, You can't stop thinking about her. It has dominated You's mind. Anytime You tries to forget about her, she comes right back. Her smile, her distinctive scent, her silky hair, her presence, it's all in You's head. When the bus comes, You gets on. This gets You a bit giddy. She's going to see Riko again. But soon, these thoughts worsens her mood. She'll see the love of her life, but she won't ever look at her. Riko will always see You as just a friend. Nothing more, nothing less. This brings pain to You's heart, as she clutches her chest. However, You is willing to do whatever she can for Riko's happiness. She knew that Riko was in love was someone else. It was her childhood friend, Chika. You couldn't do anything but accept this fact. After all, Chika was a better candidate for love. Her smile and energy were contagious. She can instantly turn any mood into a good one. In contrast, You was only good at diving. The only thing she could show off was her body, which she knew Riko wasn't interested in. The very thought of them being together brought more pain than You could ever imagine. It truly felt like someone had repeatedly stabbed her, straight into her heart. 

You recalled the first time she ever met Riko, the love of her life. It was a sunny morning. The ocean shone of a beautiful azure. The wind carried a pleasant smell of cherry blossoms. You was frolicking her way to school, enjoying the view. It was the start of a new school year and You was excited to go back to school, interacting with all her classmates. She entered the classroom, saying her usual catchphrase. "Ohayousoro!" You said. "You-chan, good morning!" the orange-haired girl waved. That was Chika, You's childhood friend. "I'm so excited for the new school year!" You exclaimed as she sat down in her chair. "Ehh... I don't want more homework..." Chika complained. You laughed. "Chika-chan, don't be like that! Imagine all the new experiences you'll have during the new school year!" You said. As she finished that sentence, the door slid open, their teacher walking in. "Welcome back, class. Today, I have a transfer student coming into this class, come in please," the teacher said. A beautiful girl with wine-red hair walked in. Her aura emitted a very mature aura. She gracefully walked towards the podium and spun to face the class. "Nice to meet you, I'm Riko Sakurauchi. I recently transffered here from Tokyo's Otonokizaka High School," she responded. It was truly love at first sight.

As You recalled this memory, the bus had stopped abruptly in front of Uranahoshi Girls' High School. You was snapped out of her trance and dashed off the bus. You breathed a sigh of relief and stared at the entrance of her school. She was thankful towards the school because it had let her meet the love of her life. She walked in and made way towards her classroom. A few of her admirers had waved to her as she made her way down the hall. You was pretty famous within the school because of her athletic abilities. But she didn't let her fans distract her from Riko. 

When You entered the classroom, she saw Riko and Chika bickering. "Chika-chan! Why didn't you do your homework this time?" Riko reprimanded. "Ehh... cause I was up watching µ's videos... hey Riko-chan did you see this video?" Chika said, avoiding the question. "Don't try to change the subject, Chika-chan!" Riko said. You stood in the doorway, careful to not disturb their conversation. "I'm not!" Chika complained. "Why were you trying to copy my homework?" Riko asked sternly. "Um... I wasn't copying your homework... I was just using it as, er, reference!" Chika answered. "Yeah... sure," Riko said sarcastically. It was then the two noticed You in the doorway. "You-chan, good morning!" Chika greeted. "Good morning, You-chan," Riko said. You couldn't stand it. She could feel her chest tightening. If she was alone, she would yell, and cry herself to sleep. But she can't do that. She had to put up a facade. A persona. "Ohayousoro! You two are here early!" You said. "Yeah, cause Riko stayed over and forced me awake in the morning..." Chika complained. "You should get in the habit of waking early, Chika-chan..." Riko said. You could feel her heart shatter. The world stopped for her. She couldn't help but be jealous. But they were her friends, she had to be happy for them. You put up her mask again. You giggled then nudged Chika's arm. "You guys aren't doing _anything_ are you?" You teased. "No! Stop teasing me, You-chan!" Chika protested. Riko blushed. "We are not doing anything... just discussing some things..." Riko responded as she cleared her throat. You could feel her heart twist and slowly warp out of shape. She felt so weak that she can literally fall to the ground at this particular moment. But she couldn't. She had to be strong.

As classes end, and Aqours started their practice on the roof, You couldn't suppress the pain developing in her lungs and throat. She could feel that there's something there. It was depriving her of oxygen. She couldn't breathe, it was choking her. "You-chan, are you okay?" Riko asked. "No problem at all!" You said with a salute. "Oh, okay. You look really pale. Take a break if you need it." Riko suggested concerned. "Yousoro!" You responded. But she wasn't okay. Anytime Riko interacted with Aqours she could feel another blade be stuck into her heart. When they took a break from practice, You went to a secluded part of the roof and leaned against the bar. She watched as the wind carried the cherry blossom petals in the air. " _Pretty_ ," You thought. Then suddenly, she felt something coming up from her throat. You coughed into the palm of her hand. It was there that she felt something. She opened her palm and there layed a single cherry blossom bud. She dropped the bud, paying no mind to it. But this was only the start.

At night, You's coughing became worse. The single bud she had in the palm of her hand soon turned to a few, which turned to several. Her coughing was sporatic and each time the amount of buds coming out would increase. Everytime she coughed, not only could she feel her lungs in pain, but also her heart. It was the same wrenching pain she felt when she saw Riko. It was so bad that You couldn't sleep that night. All she could think about is the pain and Riko.

When You woke up, her head was covered in a pile of cherry blossom buds, from all the coughing she did from last night. You cleaned the buds up, making sure her mom wouldn't see them and disposed of them. Once she did that, You looked in her drawers for a face mask. She put on the face mask to make sure no buds fall out if she were to cough. Once she changed into her school uniform, she headed for school.

When You arrived at school, she could see the same scene play out in front of her. Opening the door to her classroom, she is met with Riko interacting with Chika yet again. It pained You. You coughed and alerted the pair. "You-chan, are you okay?" Riko asked, concerned. You had to put up a facade, yet again. "N-No! I'm fine. I just have a little cold, that's all," You responded. "You-chan, you have to take care of your health! If you are sick, we won't know who else can help Ruby with the costumes!" Chika said. "No worries, I'm all okay! Yousoro!" You responded.

During class, all You could do is look at Riko. She stayed in her mind the whole day and couldn't help but admire Riko. She was a talented pianist and could get along with anyone. However, dark thoughts soon assualted her mind. All You could think about was of other people interacting with Riko. Until suddenly a clear picture popped in her mind. It was one of Riko and Chika together, their hands intertwined. Their lips getting ever closer, as they close their eyes, starting to get into a passionate kiss. All of this starts You's series of coughs. You's coughs were so alarming that it stops the class. She couldn't breathe, she could feel her heart and lungs collaspe. "Y-You-chan, are you okay?" Riko asked concerned. "Watanabe-san, do you need to see the nurse?" the teacher asked. "I-I'm fine. I just need to use the bathroom..." You said as she dashed out the classroom. 

She felt tears fall down her eyes, followed by a series of coughs. Whatever she was coughing up was filling up her mask and she had to dispose of them. She got to the bathroom in time and took off her mask. She started coughing into the trash can and out came cherry blossom petals, instead of buds. After a fit of coughing, You lifted her face up from the trash can. Suddenly she heard a voice. "You-chan, are you there?" the voice went. She could recognize that voice anywhere. It was Riko's. You quickly put on her mask and responded. "Y-Yeah, what do you need?" You asked. Riko walked into the bathroom. "Oh, you were away for so long so I was concerned. Are you okay? I heard you coughing quite a bit..." Riko said. "N-No, I'm fine! It's just a little cold, I swear!" You assured. "If you say so. Please rest if you don't feel well..." Riko said. "Let's head back." You said. But it was all a lie. It was a forest of lies You hid in.

That day's Aqours practice was the worse by far. You, out of all people, had to stop in the middle of practice and rest. She couldn't handle the pain in her chest any longer. You started coughing again and the rest of Aqours became concerned. "You-chan, what's wrong?" Chika asked. You couldn't respond and could only cough non stop. She was so sick that her knees belted and gave up. She fell to the floor with her hands catching her. The rest of Aqours ran up to You and helped her up. "Y-You-chan! Are you okay?" Riko asked. The rest of the members came up with towels and water. As Riko held the water bottle up to You's mouth, You's coughing started to stop. "Here, You-chan, some water," Riko said as her hand made her hand towards You's face mask. You, startled, smacked Riko's hand. You suddenly froze. You cursed herself for doing that. It was over. Whatever chance You had at Riko, it was all over at that moment. Even if Riko was with Chika, even if Riko somehow saw You a different way, even if Riko had never seen You that way, it was all over. You's world suddenly came crashing down. You had messed up. You got up with all her strength and dashed for the door. Despite You being sick, she mustered all her energy and dashed down the stairs. With each motion, her coughs grow intensively worse. Now, instead of petals coming out, they were full cherry blossoms. She could only hear faint yells behind her as she almost succumbs to pain. She hides behind a tree outside a school to lead them off her trail. It worked as she could hear the rest of Aqours running out of the gate. You tries her hardest to suppress her coughs, and luckily none of Aqours heard her. Once she sees and hears that no one is near the immediate vicinity, she lets out all her suppressed coughs. Once she's done, she gets up and starts walking towards the bus station. You really did mess up.

You spends several days crying and coughing, confined in her room. Her bed was virtually filled with cherry blossoms at that point. Luckily, her mom wasn't home, and was off at sea sailing with her father. She couldn't suppress her coughs or her sobbing. The pain was worsening. She could barely breathe now. But maybe that was for the better. You didn't want to live anymore. What she did was unforgivable, and she couldn't bear living with what she did. Suddenly, she hears her doorbell ring. She peeks through her closed curtains and sees two people. It was Riko and Chika. Seeing them together, You couldn't be happier, but yet the pain still stung her. You couldn't be with Riko, after such an act. You was a horrible person, and Riko wouldn't forgive her for it. It made sense for Chika to be with her instead. You's heart stung, but she endured it. She made sure the muffle her coughs and sniffles.

You's mother called You a few days later. "You, why aren't you going to school?" her mother asked. "S-Sorry mom, I'm not feeling too well..." You said as she coughed. "Oh alright, do you need me to call school?" her mother ask. "N-No... it's okay, I'll go tomorrow," You responded. "Alright sweetie, feel better," her mother said as she ended the call. You snuffed her face in her pillow again. You started coughing again. Now, what was coming out were fully bloomed cherry blossoms. Suddenly, her phone ringed, notifying a notification. You looked at her phone and saw a message from Riko. You started coughing again. Once her coughing stopped, she opened the message. "You-chan, feel better! We're all waiting for you,". Attatched to it was a picture of Aqours. You closed her phone. She knew she had to apologize.

The next day, You had difficulty getting up. The fully bloomed flowers were filling up her lungs. She managed to drag her body up from bed, but even that was burdensome. You stared at her desk. She met eyes with her unfinished love letter she planned on giving to Riko. You sat down and decided to finish it. By the time You had finished writing, it was almost past school hours. You could feel her time draining. She had to do it today. She called a taxi and grasped her love letter. She hurried the driver as she coughed out cherry blossoms profusely. She tipped the driver generously and ran through the gates. As she ran through the crowd, she could hear murmurs from the other girls. But she kept running. She got strange stares as she ran through the halls of her school. But she won't stop.

You ran for the roof with all her might. Cherry blossoms flowed out of her mouth as she ran, suffocating her even furthur. She finally reached the door and threw it open. There she saw the members of Aqours training. They all suddenly looked at the door. "Y-You-chan?! What are you doing here?" Riko asked. "R-Riko-chan I-". You then stopped. Words won't come out. She then felt her body fall to the side. When her body hit the floor, she couldn't move. She hears muffled screams and then she blacked out.

 

You's eyes opened and she was met with a white ceiling. She looked to her left and saw a table with a bunch of snacks and flowers. Then when she looked to her right, a girl with wine-red hair in a white sailor uniform was sitting on a chair. " _Is this the hospital_?" You thought. When she shifted her gaze back to the girl, her eyes opened. "Ah! You-chan, you're awake. Are you feeling alright?" the girl asked. "Who are you?" You asked. The girl's eyes widened. "Y-You-chan, t-that's a funny joke...!" the girl forced out. "It wasn't a joke. I don't know who you are," You responded. The girl started crying. "Y-You-chan... you don't know what this is?" the girl asked as she held out a pink envelope, closed with a heart shaped sticker. "No, what is that?" You asked. More tears streamed out the girl's eyes. "Seriously, You-chan? You don't remember me?" the girl asked. You shook her head. "I'm sorry You-chan... I pushed you away all this time... and this had to happen to you. I'm sorry. " the girl said.

> _I'll keep this short and get to the point. Riko-chan, whenever I look at you, my heart can't help but skip a beat. When I first met you, it was love at first sight. I can't help but admire you. Your music soothes my soul and every time I hear it, it makes me happy. I tried to deny this feeling and continue with my life, but I couldn't ignore it. This feeling has never gone away but has actually grown. Then I realized. I am in love with you. I love you, Riko Sakurauchi. Please meet me behind the school after your Aqours practice, I'll be waiting._

"You-chan, this whole time, I've loved you. I'm sorry I was too scared to approach you," the girl said as she cried.

**Author's Note:**

> Side Note: At the end, the words in italics and in the blockquote is You's love letter.
> 
> An epilogue will be released in some time. Expect it in a week or so.


End file.
